Getting off the Pipe — Part 1, How to Unplug the Taser

(If you haven’t yet, here’s the preamble for this series: Getting off the Pipe — Part 0, It’s Time)

Just weeks ago my days were full of countless concentration-busting, behavior-changing phone alerts, notifications, buzzes, zaps and haptic taps… the majority of which were totally unnecessary.

Although the other side of that red notification dot was often an just update to terms of service or some shitty 10% discount offer, I couldn’t help but see what the slot machine had in store. (In writing this I remembered the Germans put up a big one story privacy screen around autobahn crashes because they know we can’t look away. I felt less bad.)

Below are a couple things I have found helpful in preventing attention abuse from my phone.

A Quick Win

When I need to concentrate or just want to enjoy some free time… I put my phone in another room. Out of sight can really be out of mind. I have found this especially helpful at bedtime — my phone is banished from the bedroom like a dog with diarrhea.

Drastically reducing app taps, dings & zaps — easy as 1,2,3

Good news: iOS gives you a tremendous amount of control over your app notifications. To make sense of all the options, I created 3 settings profiles which correspond to 3 disruption levels.

Level 1: Red Alert — the full monty

Only a very few things fit in this category for me: phone calls, video calls and calendar alerts. That’s it. Nothing else can make a sound or take over my screen.

Tips to be aggressive: at first I thought so many more apps deserved to be in my face. “What if my Uber driver was waiting on me!?!” but then realized, I watch for the damn driver anyway, check my flight manually the morning of AND most of the “urgent apps” can text or call me anyway.

Level 2: Badges only

Badges are the little red dot in the corner of an app with a number in it. I, like many, perceive them as a to do list. The trigger is so effective apps use badges all the time to lure you in. Your bank will hide boring announcements about new branches or banal app updates behind that dot. YouTube will let you know EVERY TIME someone you follow posts a new video. They abuse it, so screw em.. they’re about to lose the privilege.

I turned off everything but email, vital messaging apps and one project management tool (Monday).

Tips to be aggressive: kill as much as you can right now and every time you are conned by an app with a bogus badge alert, kill it too.

Level 3: peace & quiet

The easiest button to push and oh will it make the difference—no more dings, buzzes or dots.

A list of “important” apps that I happily put on time out:

• credit cards / banking / stocks (I check periodically and have autopay)
• Netflix/YouTube, all entertainment apps (if its so dope I’ll read about it)
• Amazon / shopping (I buy, you always deliver. I don’t need Dominos pizza tracker)
• AT&T / utilities / other services (you already text me)
• And absolutely everything else that wasn’t in Level 1 or 2.

Follow this challenge: kill ’em all and wait to see what you miss.

The Results

Adjusting notifications took about 15 minutes in one sitting and some fine tuning over a day or so but made a big difference. My screen time went down and I only opened apps when I wanted to. It’s hardly a panacea for all that ails me digitally, but it was a great first step and paid dividends over time.

For god’s sake don’t subscribe for more alerts…but if you check in later I’ll keep the series going. Current drafts are:

Getting off the Pipe — social media

Getting off the Pipe — email

Getting off the Pipe — nuclear options